It was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives, sure it was early, and that alone had them all scared, but Mina was back with the mid-wife, and Jonathan, John and Arthur were sitting together. Van Helsing couldn't make it in time, not when Mina was a month early with their little life. It was fine though. For the first time in weeks the Crew of Light were together, with drinks and merriment ready to celebrate with the brightest light of all, and the new little member. Only... A month early is never right, more so in 1900.
A scream had ripped back from the bedroom Jonathan and Mina shared, the bed that served as her birthing bed. Jonathan was on his feet like lightning, as Arthur grabbed his wrist. "Calm down man, it's our Mina, she's faced worse than a baby."
"I should be with her." "You know that is not allowed." Jonathan sighed just as the midwife came out and yelled for John, as the closest doctor around... even if he wasn't that kind of doctor.
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Mina's body had just been taken by John with the help of the others. They had given Jonathan time to process it. Time alone, as any man would need. Mina had been his childhood friend, his first love, his wife. She had been his reason for fighting to survive that nightmare and now, on what should be a happy day. Jonathan Harker was sitting in a house full of ghosts, staring at the blood soaked bed he had shared with her the night before. Thinking of the way she giggled just last night when he had sat up and tickled down her side, reminding her over and over how much he loved her.
Like flutter-patted teenagers, the way they used to be before she started teaching etiquette, and he took his exams. He felt the tears spilling from his eyes and he hated it, he was supposed to be a man. He was supposed to be beyond this, Harker hadn't cried since the night the brides nearly ate him, and he had to listen to them eat the baby... The baby...
Was this his punishment for not saving that child? How could he have? He was a prisoner, he was already weak by then... and now the light of his life was gone. All that was left was blood.
....Blood.
So very much blood.
The smell was overpowering.
He didn't remember moving, just the feeling of the bottle of whiskey dropping from his fingers to the floor, spilling out on Mr. Hawkins expensive rug. Jonathan had been carrying the bottle since his friends left with his wife's corpse. The closer he got to their bed, the more power the scent was... Everything was spinning as he leaned forward.
"JONATHAN! DEAR GOD MAN!" Who was that what had happened? He felt arms around him pulling him, he could smell the smell of Arthur's cigarettes and John snapping before his face. "Jonathan, what are you doing?"
It was only then that he saw his reflection, blood all over his face and hands, down his neck, realizing they had just yanked him off the bed, he let out an unearthly scream of anguish. What had he done? What happened? "Come with me, Jonathan. You need not be alone. It's going to be alright." Arthur pulled his handkerchief out as he pushed it into Jonathan's hand, and they half drug him out, as he tried to clean his face.
"Where's Mina? What happened to Mina." "It's alright Jonathan, you just need to rest, my friend. It's been a long day."
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John and Jonathan had spent a few hours talking, Arthur had long retired home. John was getting tired, and the lunatics required seeing after.
"Just stay here and get some rest. I'll be back." He spoke as he left the room. The window that Dracula had burst out when he attacked Mina in this very room months ago was long replaced. Still, he could still remember them snapping him out of the daze and the sight of her on the floor, screaming she was unclean.
His darling Mina.
He couldn't remember falling asleep, he had been sitting next to the bed looking out the window at the moon in the sky. Next thing he knew, it was well in the afternoon. Arthur had come and sat on the floor with him, trying to coax him into a walk through the park. Instead, he sobbed again against his friend. Poor Arthur knew something of the pain, Lucy, poor Lucy had died too, and in such a horrible way. Death all around. A small comfort in such agony.
"Just... Here is fine, Art." He spoke as he took one of Arthur's cigars and smoked with him quietly. A gentlemen's vice, but one Mina had not liked. "I'll have to plan her funeral tomorrow, time is running short." "We will help you, Jonny, Van Helsing will be here tomorrow to help us." Van Helsing had been called last night as soon as they saw Jonathan licking blood off his bed. They were worried, the canines were already growing in, and the mirrors were removed for fear of how he would react.
When Van Helsing arrived, Arthur and John went out for a while the old man hugged Jonathan, the two talking quite seriously about Mina, and their son, Quincey. How she must be in heaven with the boy. And now, Jonathan must find something to keep going, for Mina's sake, for their little Quincey's sake, so that one day they may be reunited.
"Professor" John called from the door. "We just need to lend you, Jonathan, you can stay there if you want." The tone was more of an order to stay than an offer, The old man pushed off the bed where he had been sitting watching Jonathan, moving on out.
He had been in his dark thoughts again by the time he realized that John and Van Helsing had not returned yet. For the basically first time since he was dragged into the room, Harker pushed himself up and started out of the room to Jack's office.
"John? Abraham!" He called out, hearing no one but the lunatics, it was so much quieter here with Renfield dead. Poor man. Jonathan walked towards the office where he figured they may be. Wanting to go get air, to get away from the room where she was attacked, to get as far away from Carfax Abbey as he could.
Only... when he opened John's office, he saw the medicine cabinet unlocked. All he could think of was his dear Mina dead and cold and alone... and how tomorrow he would have to hand over her wedding dress so she could be dressed for burial. How soon she would be in the cold ground while he was forced to move on. How could he ever move on from Mina? How brilliant, wonderful Mina.
Mina was always so much stronger than him, he had brought Dracula to their door. Jonathan had put that baby in her. He had put her in the grave. Why was it she had to die while he lived on?
He moved forward taking out one of the bottles. Staring down at it. Dracula was dead, Mr. Hawkins was dead, Lucy was dead, Quincey was dead, Mina and their little life were dead, what if Jonathan could be dead and return to those he adored? It was selfish, but he was tired of pretending to be strong. He knew by the laws of his religion he was resigning himself to hell, but he was so tired of being strong.
Taking the cap off the bottle of Laudanum. He should leave a not apologizing to John for breaking his trust, but at this point. Well, what was the point?
Draining the liquid down, he always hated the taste of Laudanum, it was gross in small doses, but so much worse chugging a whole bottle. The last thing he wanted was to botch this.
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"Oh god! Jonathan!" John rushed over as Van Helsing trailed after, they had tried to hurry, but Mina's missing body was worrying. They couldn't return until they were sure she was truly missing.
"He's gone, friend Jack." Van Helsing spoke, disappointment heavy as he spoke. Checking all of his pulse points and heart.
"We should have called upon Arthur." "There is no time for should have. We need to call fo..." Van Helsing started, as John interrupted while holding the empty bottle.
"...He drank it all...Jonathan was always stubborn."
"Hush!" Van Helsing spoke as he stared down at Jonathan's corpse, watching small twitches happen, as he recalled the very reason he was called in. He reached down, pulling Jonathan's lip up more as the glassy blue eyes stared up at him. "By god...it's death itself. Death itself triggers the change."
As he spoke it, an unneeded gasp ripped from Jonathan's lungs, followed by an unholy scream of horror. A sound they had never heard come from the mild mannered soilictor in life as he tried to sit up. "Stewart! Help hold him down. Jonathan, calm yourself, you are returning from the pit, I need you calm now!" A strong slap across the face stopped the screaming.
No no no, this wasn't what he wanted it at all. This was far from what he wanted!
"I know you hate me, but I am not letting you die alone, and your family is out making preparations for the transfer of power."
"That is why I have a solicitor."
"I have been in your basement for nearly two decades."
"Not, you Mr. Harker, never you. You are not that man, you're my pet monster. My once friend." The old man hissed, and yet Jonathan held his hand, still watching those old tired eyes.
"I know, old friend. Still, you have been so bitter these last years, if I am to be honest and truthful, no one else wants to be near you right now. A far cry from the man who won me and my poor wife over."
"Oh madam Mina... Her poor soul."
Something in his tone made Jonathan's instincts kick into over drive. He only had until dawn before he was pushed back to the basement. He hadn't told anyone yet, what he planned to tell the old man as he died, for now he watched silently. "You know I never hated you? I've never been mad at the way you treated me, I caused her death, I deserve worse, but all I ever asked was that you paid attention, some of those people you make me hurt, they don't seem bad. I've told you, I do not feel different."
"Nein, you are all monsters. I should never have listened to friend John. I should have ended you there on the floor."
"Yet, you didn't, and you have someone to see you off into death's hands. Please do give my best to Mina and our child, as I will never see them."
He watched Abraham look away, and resolved to go through his paperwork before he was shoved in the basement later. He had to. Hearing a choking noise and gasped breaths, he squeezed the old man's hand still.
"Don't fight it, trust me, it is frightful, but you will have the good end, my old friend." Jonathan spoke soothingly, finally starting to see the light drain, he leaned closer and whispered into the old man's ear. "I can move in the daylight now." Seeing the horror start to cross the man's face before death fully pulled him down, he offered a soft smile, reaching out to close the man's eyes, and lay a shilling on each eye. Arranging him in proper death fashion, as he stepped out, seeing the man's family and workers outside. "He has passed into the great beyond." He spoke as he moved to walk out as they walked in. None questioned him as he made his way into the study to sit at the desk.
It was nearly dawn when he found the entry about Mina and Dracula being spotted together. He felt his heart drop into his stomach. He wanted to scream and argue, but instead he stood up, closing the great book of notes of the Van Helsing. Making his way back to the basement without having to be told. Tomorrow would truly start the new dawn, maybe the daughter would run things better.
----- 1952------
'Harker! I don't care what it says! Do your duty!' He heard the latest Van Helsing yell at him as he held the silver edged Kukri knives up, looking at the young female vampire cowering before him.
'Please sir! I haven't killed anyone on purpose! I just want to be left alone! I mean no harm!'
'HARKER!' The scream of his name came louder as he moved forward with a fast spin, cleaning the woman's head off in one swipe, feeling horrid for it. He believed her. He used to be such a good judge of character.
Dropping one of the small dynamite like sticks that had been created the past few years to burn the whole body up, he moved to walk out. One of the new recruits, holding the box that housed his blades when he wasn't hunting. They didn't trust him with them. He laid them down inside, and peeled off the gloves that protected his hands from the silver, dropping them on top of the blades.
Lady Van Helsing stepped forward to read him the riot act for daring to hesitate.
Later in the mid-morning, when everyone assumed him to be asleep or sulking after getting chewed out, instead he was quietly shoving his belongings into the trunk Art had gifted him on his first official hunt. No one was ever on guard in the day, none knew he could stomach the sun. He still acted as if it terrified him for this goal years in the making. With his long coat pulled on, and the hat he wore out to hide his hair in the night, he moved and used his nails to force the bolts out of the hinges of his barred door. Silly of them to think he was so easily caged. A few moments later the trunk was on the floor in the main vault, yanking out the box with his blades, and the old travel purse he used to carry that housed his wedding band and photos. Throwing it in the trunk, he now had to be careful as he slipped out of the house and down the street.
He stood out like a sore thumb when he finally stepped on the street in his dated suit, instead of the new styles of the world. And yet he hurried as fast as he could looking for a taxi to get to the train station. He had to go. He needed to escape this Amsterdam and get back to his beloved England, then flee further. If Jonathan had a say, he would never return to that life. He was so tired of the screams.
Into the Night - CW; death and suicide
A scream had ripped back from the bedroom Jonathan and Mina shared, the bed that served as her birthing bed. Jonathan was on his feet like lightning, as Arthur grabbed his wrist. "Calm down man, it's our Mina, she's faced worse than a baby."
"I should be with her."
"You know that is not allowed." Jonathan sighed just as the midwife came out and yelled for John, as the closest doctor around... even if he wasn't that kind of doctor.
Mina's body had just been taken by John with the help of the others. They had given Jonathan time to process it. Time alone, as any man would need. Mina had been his childhood friend, his first love, his wife. She had been his reason for fighting to survive that nightmare and now, on what should be a happy day. Jonathan Harker was sitting in a house full of ghosts, staring at the blood soaked bed he had shared with her the night before. Thinking of the way she giggled just last night when he had sat up and tickled down her side, reminding her over and over how much he loved her.
Like flutter-patted teenagers, the way they used to be before she started teaching etiquette, and he took his exams. He felt the tears spilling from his eyes and he hated it, he was supposed to be a man. He was supposed to be beyond this, Harker hadn't cried since the night the brides nearly ate him, and he had to listen to them eat the baby... The baby...
Was this his punishment for not saving that child? How could he have? He was a prisoner, he was already weak by then... and now the light of his life was gone. All that was left was blood.
....Blood.
So very much blood.
The smell was overpowering.
He didn't remember moving, just the feeling of the bottle of whiskey dropping from his fingers to the floor, spilling out on Mr. Hawkins expensive rug. Jonathan had been carrying the bottle since his friends left with his wife's corpse. The closer he got to their bed, the more power the scent was... Everything was spinning as he leaned forward.
"JONATHAN! DEAR GOD MAN!" Who was that what had happened? He felt arms around him pulling him, he could smell the smell of Arthur's cigarettes and John snapping before his face. "Jonathan, what are you doing?"
It was only then that he saw his reflection, blood all over his face and hands, down his neck, realizing they had just yanked him off the bed, he let out an unearthly scream of anguish. What had he done? What happened? "Come with me, Jonathan. You need not be alone. It's going to be alright." Arthur pulled his handkerchief out as he pushed it into Jonathan's hand, and they half drug him out, as he tried to clean his face.
"Where's Mina? What happened to Mina."
"It's alright Jonathan, you just need to rest, my friend. It's been a long day."
John and Jonathan had spent a few hours talking, Arthur had long retired home. John was getting tired, and the lunatics required seeing after.
"Just stay here and get some rest. I'll be back." He spoke as he left the room. The window that Dracula had burst out when he attacked Mina in this very room months ago was long replaced. Still, he could still remember them snapping him out of the daze and the sight of her on the floor, screaming she was unclean.
His darling Mina.
He couldn't remember falling asleep, he had been sitting next to the bed looking out the window at the moon in the sky. Next thing he knew, it was well in the afternoon. Arthur had come and sat on the floor with him, trying to coax him into a walk through the park. Instead, he sobbed again against his friend. Poor Arthur knew something of the pain, Lucy, poor Lucy had died too, and in such a horrible way. Death all around. A small comfort in such agony.
"Just... Here is fine, Art." He spoke as he took one of Arthur's cigars and smoked with him quietly. A gentlemen's vice, but one Mina had not liked. "I'll have to plan her funeral tomorrow, time is running short."
"We will help you, Jonny, Van Helsing will be here tomorrow to help us." Van Helsing had been called last night as soon as they saw Jonathan licking blood off his bed. They were worried, the canines were already growing in, and the mirrors were removed for fear of how he would react.
When Van Helsing arrived, Arthur and John went out for a while the old man hugged Jonathan, the two talking quite seriously about Mina, and their son, Quincey. How she must be in heaven with the boy. And now, Jonathan must find something to keep going, for Mina's sake, for their little Quincey's sake, so that one day they may be reunited.
"Professor" John called from the door. "We just need to lend you, Jonathan, you can stay there if you want." The tone was more of an order to stay than an offer, The old man pushed off the bed where he had been sitting watching Jonathan, moving on out.
He had been in his dark thoughts again by the time he realized that John and Van Helsing had not returned yet. For the basically first time since he was dragged into the room, Harker pushed himself up and started out of the room to Jack's office.
"John? Abraham!" He called out, hearing no one but the lunatics, it was so much quieter here with Renfield dead. Poor man. Jonathan walked towards the office where he figured they may be. Wanting to go get air, to get away from the room where she was attacked, to get as far away from Carfax Abbey as he could.
Only... when he opened John's office, he saw the medicine cabinet unlocked. All he could think of was his dear Mina dead and cold and alone... and how tomorrow he would have to hand over her wedding dress so she could be dressed for burial. How soon she would be in the cold ground while he was forced to move on. How could he ever move on from Mina? How brilliant, wonderful Mina.
Mina was always so much stronger than him, he had brought Dracula to their door. Jonathan had put that baby in her. He had put her in the grave. Why was it she had to die while he lived on?
He moved forward taking out one of the bottles. Staring down at it. Dracula was dead, Mr. Hawkins was dead, Lucy was dead, Quincey was dead, Mina and their little life were dead, what if Jonathan could be dead and return to those he adored? It was selfish, but he was tired of pretending to be strong. He knew by the laws of his religion he was resigning himself to hell, but he was so tired of being strong.
Taking the cap off the bottle of Laudanum. He should leave a not apologizing to John for breaking his trust, but at this point. Well, what was the point?
Draining the liquid down, he always hated the taste of Laudanum, it was gross in small doses, but so much worse chugging a whole bottle. The last thing he wanted was to botch this.
"Oh god! Jonathan!" John rushed over as Van Helsing trailed after, they had tried to hurry, but Mina's missing body was worrying. They couldn't return until they were sure she was truly missing.
"He's gone, friend Jack." Van Helsing spoke, disappointment heavy as he spoke. Checking all of his pulse points and heart.
"We should have called upon Arthur."
"There is no time for should have. We need to call fo..." Van Helsing started, as John interrupted while holding the empty bottle.
"...He drank it all...Jonathan was always stubborn."
"Hush!" Van Helsing spoke as he stared down at Jonathan's corpse, watching small twitches happen, as he recalled the very reason he was called in. He reached down, pulling Jonathan's lip up more as the glassy blue eyes stared up at him. "By god...it's death itself. Death itself triggers the change."
As he spoke it, an unneeded gasp ripped from Jonathan's lungs, followed by an unholy scream of horror. A sound they had never heard come from the mild mannered soilictor in life as he tried to sit up. "Stewart! Help hold him down. Jonathan, calm yourself, you are returning from the pit, I need you calm now!" A strong slap across the face stopped the screaming.
No no no, this wasn't what he wanted it at all. This was far from what he wanted!
Leaving on a Southern Train
"That is why I have a solicitor."
"I have been in your basement for nearly two decades."
"Not, you Mr. Harker, never you. You are not that man, you're my pet monster. My once friend." The old man hissed, and yet Jonathan held his hand, still watching those old tired eyes.
"I know, old friend. Still, you have been so bitter these last years, if I am to be honest and truthful, no one else wants to be near you right now. A far cry from the man who won me and my poor wife over."
"Oh madam Mina... Her poor soul."
Something in his tone made Jonathan's instincts kick into over drive. He only had until dawn before he was pushed back to the basement. He hadn't told anyone yet, what he planned to tell the old man as he died, for now he watched silently. "You know I never hated you? I've never been mad at the way you treated me, I caused her death, I deserve worse, but all I ever asked was that you paid attention, some of those people you make me hurt, they don't seem bad. I've told you, I do not feel different."
"Nein, you are all monsters. I should never have listened to friend John. I should have ended you there on the floor."
"Yet, you didn't, and you have someone to see you off into death's hands. Please do give my best to Mina and our child, as I will never see them."
He watched Abraham look away, and resolved to go through his paperwork before he was shoved in the basement later. He had to. Hearing a choking noise and gasped breaths, he squeezed the old man's hand still.
"Don't fight it, trust me, it is frightful, but you will have the good end, my old friend." Jonathan spoke soothingly, finally starting to see the light drain, he leaned closer and whispered into the old man's ear. "I can move in the daylight now." Seeing the horror start to cross the man's face before death fully pulled him down, he offered a soft smile, reaching out to close the man's eyes, and lay a shilling on each eye. Arranging him in proper death fashion, as he stepped out, seeing the man's family and workers outside. "He has passed into the great beyond." He spoke as he moved to walk out as they walked in. None questioned him as he made his way into the study to sit at the desk.
It was nearly dawn when he found the entry about Mina and Dracula being spotted together. He felt his heart drop into his stomach. He wanted to scream and argue, but instead he stood up, closing the great book of notes of the Van Helsing. Making his way back to the basement without having to be told. Tomorrow would truly start the new dawn, maybe the daughter would run things better.
'Harker! I don't care what it says! Do your duty!' He heard the latest Van Helsing yell at him as he held the silver edged Kukri knives up, looking at the young female vampire cowering before him.
'Please sir! I haven't killed anyone on purpose! I just want to be left alone! I mean no harm!'
'HARKER!' The scream of his name came louder as he moved forward with a fast spin, cleaning the woman's head off in one swipe, feeling horrid for it. He believed her. He used to be such a good judge of character.
Dropping one of the small dynamite like sticks that had been created the past few years to burn the whole body up, he moved to walk out. One of the new recruits, holding the box that housed his blades when he wasn't hunting. They didn't trust him with them. He laid them down inside, and peeled off the gloves that protected his hands from the silver, dropping them on top of the blades.
Lady Van Helsing stepped forward to read him the riot act for daring to hesitate.
Later in the mid-morning, when everyone assumed him to be asleep or sulking after getting chewed out, instead he was quietly shoving his belongings into the trunk Art had gifted him on his first official hunt. No one was ever on guard in the day, none knew he could stomach the sun. He still acted as if it terrified him for this goal years in the making. With his long coat pulled on, and the hat he wore out to hide his hair in the night, he moved and used his nails to force the bolts out of the hinges of his barred door. Silly of them to think he was so easily caged. A few moments later the trunk was on the floor in the main vault, yanking out the box with his blades, and the old travel purse he used to carry that housed his wedding band and photos. Throwing it in the trunk, he now had to be careful as he slipped out of the house and down the street.
He stood out like a sore thumb when he finally stepped on the street in his dated suit, instead of the new styles of the world. And yet he hurried as fast as he could looking for a taxi to get to the train station. He had to go. He needed to escape this Amsterdam and get back to his beloved England, then flee further. If Jonathan had a say, he would never return to that life. He was so tired of the screams.